The beginning of chaos

I'm getting ready for a solo show here in Chicago at The University Club, and I'm surrounded by piles of things. Framed paintings, unframed paintings, empty frames, drawers full of card and cut mattes. There's paintings to finish, paintings to scan, paintings to frame, title, price and archive. There's Loud music on and no one else in the building. its late at night and I'm drinking coffee. Barefoot. slightly panicky. Comfortably certain that it will all get done. Glad the dog isn't here. Wishing my mum could see all these paintings before they go off to the gallery. This is the part where I need to work with a calendar, apportion the days, quantify the tasks and the hours available, know myself, push myself, be careful not to make mistakes. Hold the knife just so. Put the coffee down in a sensible place. Sleep enough to be awake enough. Here's a snapshot of the studio before the crunch takes its toll. it wont look like this in a week or two. Perhaps I'll remember to post another photograph at the end of September just before I hang the show.

Thinking about what I'm doing

I think one begins to discover what one is about through the process of painting over a long time.

The more I paint the more I see my critical view of the world.

The more I paint the more I discover about my passion and the more I understand WHY.

I know what I want to paint before I paint.....


but I discover something about who I am after I paint it.

Bob no longer my uncle

It used to be that I liked watercolour because I could do one everyday. start it in the morning.
Have some lunch.
Tweak it in the afternoon and

Bob's Your Uncle

...another painting done. It was very rewarding. It was immeadiate.

These days it takes me much longer and while the paintings are definitely a lot more, what you'd call "better", they do leave me feeling a little trapped. My paintings taunt me. I'm challenged to go bigger and paint with more complexity. "Beat that" each one says. "Beat that or you're not improving".

and I wonder why it is that one wants to improve?
why is it that one doesnt merely want to "do"?

recent communications and lack thereof

Well on the one hand no one wants to read stuff written just for the sake of it and on the other hand you need to stay on the line if you want to use the telephone. Know what I mean?
Its been three weeks.
So the state department got in touch and asked if I'd be interested in doing something for Obama to give to the 20 international heads of State at the G20 summit later this year in Pittsburgh. That made my day.